Before It's Too Late

Wisdom takes time, experience, and faithfulness. Sit with your elders.

Aug 08, 2026

Prioritizing time with those older than us often gets overlooked. This is a simple request:

Seek your elders while you can, and let their years lead yours.

Experiential Wisdom

Last year, my mom and I were driving home from a visit to her older sister, L. - my aunt L. It was a familiar hour-long drive, one I’d done hundreds of times. As we reflected on the day, tears filled my eyes.

More days with my mom and my aunt were not promised. Each time I say goodbye, it could be the last. I don’t say that to be melodramatic; I understand and cherish the minutes we do share.

I tentatively offered a question that felt vulnerable and risky:

“What does it feel like to be 85? Do you think about the end of your life?”

I used to want to have all the answers; now, I mostly ask questions.

My mom had endured a difficult childhood, losing her dad when she was only 17, then her mom at age 30. She enjoyed a long career as a nurse, and I attribute my comfort with doctors and medical facilities to her profound influence. I remember, as a child, running to her for comfort after I stepped on a nail, or took a softball in the face, or got bitten by one of our pet raccoons.

She keeps easy dinners in the freezer for when the grandkids visit, and makes single-serve meals to deliver to her sister.
She relentlessly searches for affordable, small gifts for special events or simple everyday giving.

She took her time answering my question.

“I wake up every day and thank the Lord for giving me breath and life.” She finally answered. “Whatever comes, I know He’s always with me.”

She described how she knew that in every terrible circumstance, in every impossible situation, in all the accidents, trials, and losses of loved ones, she was never alone. He was always with her.

Always.

My mom has made the best out of so many trying days, hoping and praying for respite, but often never receiving it. Yet, when I hear her voice or look into her eyes, I see such unwavering faith and confidence in what is yet to come.

Her gaze is firmly centered on heaven.

She has served faithfully here on earth, with her eyes always rising upward to a perfect eternity.

Our family knows that if we ask my mom to pray for something, she is reliable and persistent in bringing requests to God.

I’m so grateful she is still here to listen to and encourage me, to ask questions, to learn from, and to appreciate. And when I realize (or admit) what an incredible role model she’s been, I turn inward and ask if I’m on the same path.

Enduring Wisdom

In 2024, I walked alongside my aunt L. as she wrote her memoir using Storyworth. As I proofread her precious words and inserted photos she shared with me, I time-traveled and reminisced. But mostly, I observed and learned.

We had many conversations about ancestors, childhood memories, marriage, and legacy. She spoke of managing a household with six children, alone, while her husband was away for six weeks at a time. She shared memories of conversations with her grandmother (whom I’m named after), who lived with her family.

Devotions that my great-grandmother Ellen used to read

A prominent memory was seeing her grandmother read devotions. She described the publication, and I found an old copy on eBay for her. It was a way to connect her past and present, to honor our ancestors who built their lives on faith.

When her book was published, I sat in her living room as she opened it for the first time. Her face was radiant. Her smile filled the entire space as she read a short excerpt for family who had gathered for the big reveal.

My aunt L. reading an excerpt from the Storyworth book she wrote

In each season of life, she stepped up, rolled up her sleeves, and helped. Later in life, she started her own business, teaching piano and spurring on younger generations, regularly cheering them on as they won music competitions.

She is my godmother, taking on the responsibility for being a good Christian role model and committing to fortifying my faith. She is a superb hostess, a fantastic conversationalist, but most importantly, she always gently asks the hard questions.

At 90, every moment with her is held with deep affection and admiration.

Faithful Wisdom

We have a sign in our home that we got specifically for our then-teenagers. It says,

“You have to be young and dumb before you get to be old and wise.”

In our 60s, we look back and laugh (or cringe) at those days of youth when we knew better and rejected any freely given wisdom from our elders. Gradually, I’m developing a posture of patience that I never, ever expected to have.

Scripture gives us elders whose patience bore fruit.

Abraham was “old, advanced in age” when he became a father to Isaac. Zechariah and Elizabeth were “well along in years” when they had John. Anna was a “widow of great age” when she recognized Jesus in the temple.

“Is not wisdom found among the aged?
Does not long life bring understanding?”
-Job 12:12

We are given these pillars of faith because wisdom takes time, experience, and faithfulness.

I am now aware of times when my brain triggers my mouth, but restraint and wisdom step in to keep it closed. I’m becoming The Question Asker, not the Advice Giver.

It’s a process.

As I approach my later years, I’m clinging to the generation before me, squeezing out as much time and wisdom as possible. Pride muscles in at times, and I can be as stubborn as I was as a teenager.

Sometimes, I take this posture with God, too.

Thankfully, we get more chances to be molded into Christ-like beings. I’ve never been one to worry about age or reaching certain milestones. It’s a privilege to be advanced in age, despite the aches and pains, the lifetime of sorrows and missed opportunities.

With faith, I know God saw all of my days, and He is always, eternally working things for my good.

Even when I cross my arms and pout when my mom lovingly tries to guide me.
(Love you, Mom!)

The Value of Elders

You may live close to your elders, or it might take some effort to connect with them. In a world of comfort, convenience, and speed, it can be easy to put off what might feel awkward or overdue. I encourage you - don’t wait! Reach out today, and you will most certainly be blessed by their lifetime of experience.

If the elders in your life are no longer here, consider where you might still glean the insight that comes from a long life. Volunteer at the senior center or a local care facility. Take a minute to greet the patriarchs and matriarchs in your church on Sunday. Get to know the parents or grandparents of friends who live near you.

Here are some questions you might ask of an elder in your life:

Tell me about your faith journey.
Do you remember any significant events in your spiritual journey, such as confirmation, a time of testing, desperation, or profound gratitude?
Do you recall any specific advice from an older relative, teacher, neighbor, or mentor?
What does prayer mean to you?
What is something you would like to say to your younger self? As a teen, in early marriage, or at retirement age.
What is the most important piece of advice you would give to the loved ones you will leave behind?

Your turn:

Schedule a 10-minute call with a cherished elder this week
While they’re here, go sit with them
Record a 60-second story from your life and send it to your kids (or parents!)
Search your photos for 2016 (10 years ago) and relive memories, choosing one to share with family or friends
Write a short letter to your younger self, posing as an experienced loved one dispensing hard-earned wisdom

Before it’s too late, while they’re still here - go.

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